tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1036248285344705392024-03-13T16:12:22.601-04:00Food And other Sensory BattlesKarinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-77091462466003012082012-09-13T20:24:00.003-04:002012-09-13T20:28:58.341-04:00Just when you think things are settling down...So, Frank started school exactly one week ago. My husband and I brought him, instead of just putting him on the bus that morning. I wanted to see for myself where he would be, and to finally meet his teacher! We drove in separate cars, and Frank went with my husband. (We were going directly to our respective work as soon as we left Frank's school. My lovely boss graciously told me it was fine for me to be an hour late for school myself that morning.) <br />
<br />
Frank was wide awake and dressed at 6:30am that morning. School doesn't start until 8:45am.<br />
<br />
He was excited and chatty all morning...while he ate breakfast...while he stood outside my bedroom door talking to me while I got dressed...while he followed me back downstairs...right up until we walked in the door of the school building. Then he turned and buried his face in my chest. (Yes, my first grader's face is at my chest height now. Shut up.) <br />
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He cried, a lot. We met his teacher, who seems nice, and she told him she was going to need him to be her special helper that day. He tried to stop crying when she said that, but he just couldn't- he put his head down on the cafeteria table and cried some more.<br />
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We finally made the (for me) gut-wrenching decision to leave. "I don't think he's going to stop crying as long as we're here," I said quietly to my husband. So, we gave him one more hug, told him we loved him and were proud of him, and we left. <br />
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He's been pretty quiet about his classroom experiences so far. He plays with D, a friend from his daycare, at recess every day, and they do a lot of work during the school day, but that's pretty much it. He never mentions any other new friends he may have made. He does play with one little boy from his class at aftercare, though.<br />
<br />
I don't know...I kind of hoped to hear some new friend names by now, after a week. Am I being unrealistic? I hope no one in his class is being mean to him because he cried the first day. <br />
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Next week on Monday and Tuesday, his school is closed for Rosh Hashanah. My school is closed Monday only. His aftercare program, which is run by a local YMCA, said they run an all-day care program, at the Y, if they get 16 or more kids to sign up for it. I just got the form yesterday with the instructions to call if we wanted it for next week, so I called as soon as I got home. I then had a voicemail on my cell phone this morning, while I was in class, saying they weren't running it next week because of lack of interest. lack of interest? In a district as huge as ours is, they can't get 16 kids? Really? Maybe it's because you allowed less than 24 hours for parents to sign up for it before you decided whether to run it or not! Jerks.<br />
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Anyway, one of my coworkers had a brilliant suggestion. I emailed Frank's former daycare and asked if we could do a dropin for one day, and they said yes, since he won't be seven until NEXT September! We can in theory do this all year. It'll cost us, of course, but it's better than having to take personal days and sick days to look after him.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-61957686894392965382012-09-02T12:54:00.001-04:002012-09-02T12:54:25.720-04:00School starts this week!It's going to be an interesting week. I start back at work on Tuesday. Frank starts Thursday. My husband is working from home Tuesday and Wednesday. <br />
<br />
Frank and I toured his new school last week. Our tour guide was one of the office secretaries, Mrs N. Everyone was very nice and welcoming, even the principal. We met several teachers who were in setting up their classrooms, but didn't meet his classroom teacher. We were able to walk into his classroom, though, and he sat in his seat, briefly. <br />
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When Frank is nervous or worried or upset about something, he simply refuses to discuss it. After we toured the school, I let him play on the playground for a while. After we left, I asked him what he thought his school. "It's fine," was all he said. When I sked him, "That's all?" he responded with, "Yes, Mommy it's <em>fine</em>." Okay, then.<br />
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He has taken the same approach towards the death in the family. He flat out refuses to mention the decedent, and if her name is brought up, he pretends not to hear. He is still alternating between being angry at me and being very clingy, though. I'm not sure what else to do. So much change for this child within a short time...new school, the absence of an important family member...I hope I am not screwing up here.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-30083691362100719672012-08-21T20:35:00.002-04:002012-08-21T20:35:43.009-04:00Death in the familyAs the title says, we have had a death in my husband's family, someone who Frank was close to. It fell to me to tell him. You know how, at least once a day, as a parent, you think to yourself, "Man, I really hope I did not screw that one up too badly."? Yeah, that was my moment today. <br />
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He cried for about thirty seconds, then told me to go away so he could watch his shows. Two minutes later, he asked if the deceased had felt anything when they died. When I told him no, they just drifted away to be with God, he said okay and went back to his shows. <br />
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He has since alternated between being clingy and being downright bitchy and nasty to me all day. For the first time since he was an infant, I truly am at a complete loss as to how to handle this child. Do I reprimand him for his bitchy comments, same as I would any other day, or do I hug him and try to reassure him? Or neither? Or both? Or something else entirely? <br />
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I am emotionally drained from trying to keep an even keel for my child. It was harder to do that today than it has been since I had (and recovered from) Post Partum Depression.<br />
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Have you ever had to deliver this kind of news to your SPD child? How did they take it? How was it different from your neurotypical children?Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-30046672007698730682012-08-10T21:57:00.001-04:002012-08-10T21:57:46.288-04:00School lunchesSchool starts soon! In about three and a half weeks, to be exact. <br />
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Posts in various forums I am on have started giving me a bit of a panic attack about, of all things, lunch. Frank does not eat bread, or cheese, or cold cuts. He does not even eat peanut butter or jelly. He doesn't eat wraps, or veggies, or cheese and crackers. He doesn't eat string cheese.<br />
<br />
Keeping all this in mind...what, exactly, do I pack this kid for lunch???<br />
<br />
In daycare/kindergaten, I packed him lunch for most of his time there. When he was four, in pre-K, he wanted to start ordering the same lunches the other kids ate, so we did. I started out cautiously, only ordering him chicken nuggets, which has always been the fallback food for him. I eventually got more daring, so, by the time he was finishing up there, his last month, he ate the school lunch every day. It was great, because first and foremost, he was eating the same things as his peers! Number two, I didn't have to groggily remember on a weekday morning to pack his fish sticks or chicken nuggets. (The teachers would warm them up in the microwave for him. I sent them in an insulated bag, with an ice pack.)<br />
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In first grade, in the local elementary school this fall, though, the cafeteria staff won't be warming up his food in a microwave for him. Which brings me back to my question...what in the same of all that is good and holy do I pack this kid for lunch??<br />
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If anyone has any ideas, I'd love to hear them.<br />
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Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-60356546516055849322012-08-10T21:43:00.001-04:002012-08-10T21:43:37.007-04:00Sussex County FairWhen I was a kid, my aunt and uncle would take us to the Sussex County Fair every summer. (<a href="http://www.newjerseystatefair.org/html/list_events.cfm">http://www.newjerseystatefair.org/html/list_events.cfm</a>) I then didn't go for years, but, for the last couple of years, I've taken Frank, and he loves it. He looks forward to it all summer and asks me about once a week if it's time for the fair yet.<br />
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The SCF is what most of the country, I think, would call a state fair- there are a lot of livestock on display and horse shows, 4H kids show off the rabbits and chickens they've raised, and people compete for prizes in their crafts, like the quilts we saw. There is, of course, food, most of it horrifically unhealthy- I bought myself a funnel cake covered with cinnamon sugar and enjoyed it thoroughly. But I was only able to finish about half of it- it was simply too big for one person. Typically, I share funnel cake with my husband. I offered a piece that had no sugar on it to Frank. He looked at it like it was a poisonous snake and said in a strained voice, "No, thank you." Oh, well. if nothing else, I've taught the boy manners. <br />
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There are also a ton of rides and boardwalk style games. Unlike me, Frank is just not into looking at the cute widdle bunnies or watching someone shear a sheep. He's very quickly bored by such things, and the smell in the livestock area is utterly repulsive to him. (Yes, he is that kids who walks around the livestock sheds with his t-shirt pulled up over his mouth and nose. Oh well.)<br />
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No, Frank loves the rides, and the bigger and scarier the better. This is actually new- last year, he was still reasonably content with little kid rides, and I was safe buying him the unlimited ride bracelet and sending him by himself on stuff while I kept my feet planted firmly on terra firma. However, late last summer, you may recall, my little family went to Disney World for the first time. My husband, a complete Crazy Rides Fanatic, took Frank on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad and ruined him for all those little kid rides forever. "Oh, Mommy, no. That ride is for <em>little </em>kids. I want to do <em>that</em>!" <em>That</em> inevitably meant something spinning, or a freefall, or something really fast. To give you an idea, the Ferris Wheel, which I love because I don't have a problem with heights, is "boring". <br />
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Great. Where is my husband when I need him? Oh, yeah, at work, starting a new job this week. Terrific.<br />
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This year, I bought myself an unlimited bracelet, too. The vast majority of the rides, there was no way they were letting a five-year-old go on alone, so, yeah, me and my vertigo had to take one for the team and go on them with him. It was definitely one of those "shut your eyes and think of England" moments.<br />
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It is a testament to how much I love my son, and how much I wanted him to have a good time. I get vertigo very easily. I can do a merry-go-round and a Ferris Wheel and some slides, but that is pretty much it. I'm still not sure I have forgiven the people I went to Great Adventure with as a senior in high school who talked me into riding the Runaway Train, my vertigo is that bad. <br />
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It's funny, up until fairly recently, I never thought about this as anything but a character flaw. Now that I know a lot more about sensory issues, though, I would definitely categorize me as an avoider when it comes to crazy rides. It is helping me to get a glimpse into the world of the child with SPD. I do not have SPD, by any stretch- my inability to enjoy a good carnival ride is not a disorder in that it doesn't really interfer with my life any, usually, because my husband is usually there to do all this stuff, and I sit and wait and hold everyone's stuff while they ride. But at the fair yesterday, it was definitely a problem, one I had to take a deep breath, think of England, and just soldier forward to overcome. I did it, and my seeker son had a marvelous time, even though I have a sneaking suspiscion he felt a bit sorry for me as I squeezed my eyes shut.<br />
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But next year, the kid is either bringing a friend or my husband is coming with us.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-30602873077237677752012-08-10T21:23:00.003-04:002012-08-10T21:23:46.345-04:00Adventure AquariumTuesday, Frank and I drove over two hours south of our house to lovely Camden, NJ (Yes, that was in fact sarcasm.). We went to Adventure Aquarium (<a href="http://www.adventureaquarium.com/">http://www.adventureaquarium.com/</a>). The aquarium has been there for years, but, like a lot of good things in this state, I simply just hadn't gotten around to going; the long drive and the fact that it is in Camden, which, I'm sure many are aware, has been voted worst city in America or something like that, both kind of intimidated me.<br />
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Well, the fact that I am here blogging about it tells you that we survived the trip. The powers that be, when they re-did the entire Camden waterfront (there is also a battleship there and a minor league ballpark), decided to essentially make a flyover ramp from the neaest highway to the waterfront, so you don't really get into the worst parts of Camden. <br />
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We were at the aquarium for over four hours. It's a nice place, with plenty to do, especially for kids. I did not, of course, have time to leisurely read through much that was posted next to various tanks, but we did manage to see everything, including their Shark Tunnel two or three times. The Shark Tunnel is pretty much exactly what it sounds like: It is a tunnel built going through a tank full of sharks, so you have sharks to your right, left, and swimming directly over your head. It was very cool; both Frank and I agreed that was the best thing there. (There were several exhibits where you could touch various sea creatures, too, and I asked Frank, "Really? The Shark Tunnel was better than touching a sting ray?" "Oh, yes, Mommy," he assured me. "Those were <em>great white sharks</em> in there!")<br />
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We ate lunch there, too. The cafe had a wide variety of options, health and unhealthy; all, however, were way overpriced. The pizza was rather good, though.<br />
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I would recommend this trip, except parents of SPD-ers who get overwhelmed in a lot of noise, stimulation, and crowds should consult the website and plan their trip carefully. The website lists "high volume days", when they have a lot of field trips scheduled. Tuesday was not listed as a high volume day, and it was stll pretty crowded; I think I would even be overhwelmed on a high volume day!!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-27083007420137603722012-08-06T19:52:00.002-04:002012-08-06T19:52:21.791-04:00Land of Make BelieveWe live in northern New Jersey, and, despite the fact that I also grew up in northern NJ, I don't think I ever went to the Land of Make Believe (<a href="http://lomb.com/">http://lomb.com</a>) as a child. And, despite the fact that it's less than a forty-five minute drive from our current home, where we've lived for four years, we had never taken Frank there before, either. I decided to remedy that today.<br />
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I had always assumed that it was a place full of little kid rides and not very big. Well, it is a bit compact, but there's plenty to do, for little and big kids. The fact that it's so compact actually works in the favor of the short legged little ones who walk with their parents! There's also a decent-sized water park with slides and a wading pool, as well as different water-based activities. <br />
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Frank LOVED it. We were there for about four hours, and he didn't want to leave! We spent about an hour and forty-five minutes in the water area, which I was very happy about. You see, while at camp, after he had gotten a good start with swimming, he fell into the pool at one point, and had to be fished out by a lifeguard, which scared him, and he had developed a serious fear of the water. His counselors, once I alerted them that was what was bothering him, helped him to become more relaxed in the water.<br />
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Today, in the 18-inch-deep wading pool, he and I practiced his kicks- I held him while he lay prone in the water, kicking like crazy. He also had no problem frolicking around in all of the water areas, and even dragged me onto a terrifying-looking water slide! Thank God. I'm not a strong swimmer myself; it took me years to get over fear of even putting my face in the water. Now, though, I am an awesome dog-paddler, but that's pretty much it. I do not want him to grow up with the same fears and inability to swim that I have. He doesn't have to become a competitive swimmer, but I want him to be a better swimmer than I am.<br />
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All in all, it was a really nice day. The weather even cooperated, giving us relatively low humidity for a change. He wants to go back, soon. I think I do, too. The rides were just scary enough for him, but not too much so even my wimpy system could handle them. And the water park was actually pretty great.<br />
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If you live in the area, and decide to go, I recommend first thing. (They open at 10am.) It really wasn't crowded at all when we first arrived, but by the time we left, the place was PACKED!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-19567510414066866332012-07-24T08:53:00.002-04:002012-07-24T08:53:46.352-04:00UpdateSo, rugby ended last week. Overall, Frank liked it, and says he wants to play again next year, but, "I don't like having my flag pulled, Mommy. I want to do TACKLE rugby!" Um, okay, but you have to wait a good six years or so before you can do that, kid.<br />
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The situation with the other boy got marginally better. Frank made more of an effort to stay away from him at practice and during matches. However, this kid simply could NOT take a hint! He kept following Frank around. "Frank, look at this...Frank, wanna play? Frank, watch me!" Ugh. He apparently behaved pretty similarly at day camp, too.<br />
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Frank is in a different grouping at daycamp for this week and next week, because it's a different session, and this other kid is not in this group.<br />
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I'm just relieved we do not live in the same town as this family, so the boys won't see each other in school. They will go to the same regional high school, though. I guess I'll worry about that in nine years...Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-74274110585061202052012-07-11T20:33:00.002-04:002012-07-11T20:33:24.936-04:00I think I need advice.<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><div class="text_exposed_root text_exposed">
There’s this kid, M, who went to the same daycare as Frank until they turned four. He left as they were starting preschool. I breathed a sigh of relief when the kid left, because he is a big kid for his age, and he plays roughly. Frank for some bizarre reason was drawn to this kid like a moth to flame, and he was on the receiving end more than once. It turned out, we were not the only parents happy to see this kid leave; parents started confiding in each other, and pretty much all of us had hated this kid for a couple of years! I also found out that he was quietly asked to go by the daycare director. (She didn’t tell me; another parent did. Turns out, this kid had hurt her daughter, badly enough she had to bring the kid to the doctor, and Mom is a lawyer, and you can fill in the blanks...)</div>
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<br /> Hooray, we thought, the kid is gone, and he lives in the next town over, so he and Frank won’t meet up again until high school, and then they probably won’t even remember each other.<br /> <br /> So, Frank started playing rugby in a tri-town team, and guess who’s on his team? Yep, M. Now, in the four weeks they’ve played so far, the only times I’ve witnessed the coach really yelling at Frank for not paying attention have been when he’s been goofing around with M. Then, last week, at practice, M grabbed Frank by the head and threw him down on the ground! I actually ran onto the field and helped him up, because he was not moving at first, and we haven’t had rain in I don’t even know how long, so the ground is rock-hard. Frank cried for a few minutes afterwards, and I actually yelled at M. I don’t like yelling at another kid when the parents are there, but M’s mom never said a word, either to her son or me.<br /> <br /> I actually sat Frank down after that one, and told him something I never wanted to tell my child, mostly because I know this usually backfires dramatically: I do not want him to play with M. Play together during rugby games, yes, to help the team, but I do not want him fooling around with him before or after. He promised me he wouldn’t fool around with him anymore, but then they fooled around again at last night’s practice, getting yelled at again by the coach for not following directions. <br /> <br /> Then, Frank started YMCA daycamp this week. GUESS WHO’S IN HIS GROUP? I swear we are never going to be rid of this kid.</div>
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Honestly, after observing him at rugby these last few weeks, I think he could very well have a raging case of ADHD and need medication. He has incredibly poor impulse control, for example. But his lack of impulse control is impacting my kid, and it pisses me off, and I just do not know what to do!</div>
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</span>Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-71828683680966332012012-07-09T21:33:00.001-04:002012-07-09T21:33:43.766-04:00Day CampFrank started day camp at our local YMCA today. So, if he was the one starting something completely new, why was I the one who slept so poorly last night?<br />
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Turns out, I didn't need to worry. There are at least three kids in his group whom he knew from school or rugby. As for the other kids? "I don't remember their names. We just played."<br />
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I should have known he'd be fine this morning when I dropped him off. He leaped out of the car and barely waved at me as he ran towards his group.<br />
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Of course, swimming starts tomorrow. He's never swam before. Sure, he's frolicked around at the edge of the water at the beach and stuff, and he does love his bath, but he's never been in water more than a foot deep. As I said to his counselor this morning, "He will either turn into a fish and you won't be able to yank him out of there, or he will completely freak out as soon as he touches the water. I honestly have no idea which it will be."Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-45163817449407685612012-06-30T22:37:00.001-04:002012-06-30T22:37:15.844-04:00A door closes...Yesterday, we picked up my son from his daycre for the last time. He'll go to day camp during the month of July, and in September, he will attend our local elementary school, as a first-grader.<br />
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This daycare, which is also where he attended Kindergarten, has been a part of our lives since he was five months old, and now he is five and a half years old. I'm not sure it's really sunk in for any of us that we are well and truly done with daycare yet. I'm sure it hasn't for Frank, and am not sure it'll sink in until he starts school in the fall.<br />
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So odd...he doesn't need daycare anymore. My baby is growing up!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-83927318204067545472012-06-06T20:36:00.000-04:002012-06-06T20:36:13.118-04:00Saying good bye to KindergartenMy son will graduate Kindergarten in two weeks and two days. He attends Kindergarten at the school he has always gone to, a daycare he's attended since he was five months old. Along the way, the staff there has seen us through many things: my serious illness (when he was six months old) that required me to be hospitalized for five days and home on disability for seven weeks after that.) Many childhood illnesses. (You don't really want to know what Toddler Diarrhea is, do you?) And, at 17 months, a diagnosis from an occupational therapist of Sensory Processing Disorder, with severe oral defensiveness as a key issue.<br />
<br />
The diagnosis for us was both an end and a beginning. It was an end because at last, after many months, we had an answer as to why my son flat out refused to eat "normally". Why wouldn't he eat Cheerios? Pretzels? Chicken nuggets? Why didn't he ever gum anything as a teething baby except for his own hands, or a pacifier? Why couldn't he get a latch good enough to breastfeed? <br />
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It was a beginning for me, because I had to educate myself. I had vaguely heard of kids with autism having sensory issues, so when the OT gave me the diagnosis, my first response was, "Wait...he has autism?" No, he doesn't, she explained to me. Most kids with autism do have sensory issues, but not all kids with sensory issues have autism. Okay...I guess I have some reading to do, I thought.<br />
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And so, I read. I bought every book I could find on the subject, which, at first, was not much. Books have never let me down, so they had to give me the answers I needed. How did this happen? Is it hereditary? Did I eat something, or get exposed to something, during the pregnancy that did it? Was it the 21-hour long labor that ended in emergency c-section? <br />
<br />
Personally, I think it was the last; the c-section was because his heart rate was dipping with each contraction, and that went on for a while before they did the surgery. I will never know, of course, and sometimes I lie awake at night, still, thinking about it. If I had hired a doula, like I had thought about doing, maybe labor would have gone differently for me, and I would have delivered faster, vaginally. Maybe, if I hadn't asked for the epidural when I did, and just kept walking around, things would have gone faster. Maybe maybe maybe...all these decisions I made that may have affected how my son will live his entire life. <br />
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I will never know what caused my son to have SPD. For all I know, it's in how my genes and my husband's genes mingled together, or some completely different cause science hasn't yet discovered.<br />
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What I do know, however, is my son would not be the well-adjusted child he is without the love and support from his daycare. I shared the diagnosis with the director immediately. She had heard of SPD, but didn't know much about it, and she began to read up on it, too. The staff never treated my son as "different". This was just Frank, and this is how he eats. Oh, you need us to put a food item on his plate at lunchtime? No problem. You need us to make him touch the food item, take one bite of it at lunchtime? No problem. He's not toileting at age four? No problem. <br />
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I wish everyone who had children with special needs could have such a positive experience in their child's schooling. And I hope and pray, as we get ready to say good bye to his first school, that his experiences in the rest of his school years will be as positive.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-59112842952718248912012-04-24T21:17:00.000-04:002012-04-24T21:19:05.759-04:00Random musingsNote: I originally wrote this in September, but never published it.<br />
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Frank ate a cupcake! Actually, two cupcakes- one at OT the day before his birthday, and one at school on his actual birthday. He ate the cake, and not the icing, but: My. Kid. Ate. A. CUPCAKE. (His teachers were just as excited as I was, too. It was very cute)<br />
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My husband thinks I worry too much about this sort of thing. In one respect, he's right: every six months, when I bring him to the dentist, I get compliments on the state of his teeth, to which my response is always the same: "His teeth should be pristine. He doesn't eat anything with sugar in it!" <br />
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However, as someone who was picked on for 13 straight years of school, I worry about social implications of his food issues. I don't think it's any secret to anyone who has regular interaction with children, or was once a child, that kids can be cruel. I don't want Frank to be That Weird Kid Who Won't Eat a Cupcake. Or whatever. Granted, at least at this point, he's very self-confident, and if someone says something mean to him, he gives as good as he gets, but who knows what will happen next year when he's in public school? He'll be entering in first grade, whereas most of his classmates will enter as kindergarteners, and will have had a year to cement friendships. <br />
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I worry because I read a lot, and I know that kids with SPD tend to have more social problems than kids who are neurotypical. I also know that I was picked on a lot (I was an easy target- I was painfully shy and wore glasses and had health issues.), and I work in schools, so I see firsthand every day how cruel kids can be. <br />
<br />
But, at the moment: he ate cupcakes, and he's loving kindergarten, and doing very well. And according to his pediatrician, he's in the 89% for height for his age, so, from a purely physical standpoint, we definitely made the right decision to start him in kindergarten now instead of waiting until next year.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-12811483413056219492012-04-24T21:16:00.001-04:002012-04-24T21:16:41.031-04:00ProgressI can't believe this school year is almost over! Frank has done extremely well in Kindergarten. He's reading tons, and his writing has improved dramatically. At the parent-teacher conference in January, his teacher assured me that any silliness she sees, and his abilities, including handwriting, are all perfectly age-appropriate, and she is well pleased with his progress. He'll enter public school first grade in the fall without an IEP or a 504. I registered him for first grade last month, and they told me we would know who his teacher would be by mid-July. Once we get that notification, I'll email her, intriduce myself, and explain about Frank's SPD. I have plenty of books she could borrow to read up on it, if she's not familiar with it. If he shows signs of needing additional interventions, then of course I'll ask for him to be evaluated, but right now, I'm okay with him going in unclassified. <br />
<br />
Food-wise, he's made some great strides recently. He now eats the school lunches more often than not, even things he's never eaten for us at home! Peer pressure, despite what some think, is not always a bad thing; he's watched his classmates wolf down cheese quesadillas and turkey "dinners" and been intrigued. Each time he gets a new meal, I send in a backup lunch for him, but he's never eaten any of these backup lunches. Today, at OT, he wanted to try a cheese sandwich: "Not grilled cheese, Mommy. Just cheese." He was lukewarm on the cheese and bread together, but did eat them seperately.<br />
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Our big bugaboo has always been and still is fruits and vegetables. He's tried several in OT recently, with varying degrees of success. D and I agreed long ago that once he was consistently eating one or two of each, he'd be done with OT, but I haven't shared that with Frank. He loves OT, and I could easily see him deciding to never eat another fruit or vegetable if it meant he got to keep playing with D every week!<br />
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That brings me to another change: he decided about a month ago that, "I'm a big boy now, Mommy, so you don't need to come into OT with me anymore." I had always gone into and participated in the sessions with him and D, since he was 17 months old. He's five and a half now, and I actually asked her last summer about this very issue; I had noticed many kids in the center about his age in there with the PTs and OTs, and not a parent in sight. D said it depended upon a child's issue; in Frank's case, food is such a personal issue that required a great deal of daily consistent followup at home, it was important for the parent to be involved at that point. She said she'd leave it up to me and Frank if we wanted me to keep going in or wait in the waiting room. I didn't say anything to Frank at the time, but deicded I was going to let him drive it, and had, over the last few months, been leaving during the session here and there, just to see what he'd do. Well, once Frank got a taste of it, he decided he rather liked the independence of it. He seemed rather taken aback by how easily I agreed with it, but has never turned back.<br />
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Part of me is somewhat relieved, as I admit to feeling frustrated sometimes during the sessions, but part of me feels something of a pang. This is my baby, and this is a thing he and I have always done together. My husband has come to a few sessions here and there, but, as I work a school schedule, it's far easier for me to do OT, so I've always done the bulk of it. But, now, my baby doesn't want me in there with him anymore. It's the first real thing with Frank that I can remember feeling this "he's no longer a baby" feeling, and it's very disconcerting.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-19750451259298763942011-09-17T20:54:00.000-04:002011-09-17T20:54:02.688-04:00Trampoline!Frank got a trampoline for...hm, Christmas, I think, last year. It's one of those small, individual sized ones, with a grip bar. We basically told him that we were not putting it together for him until he was using the potty: "Trampolines are for big boys who don't use diapers!" Fast forward to now. <br />
<br />
The trampoline has been in the box, in his closet, this whole time, and the other day, for the first time since he conquered the toilet, he noticed. "Mommy, I want to use my trampoline!" Uh oh. I will be the first to admit my husband is way better at Putting Things Together than I am, and I did not know if we'd have time this weekend to do it.<br />
<br />
However, it turned out, we did have time, this morning. Darrel and I put it together, and the kid LOVES it. Most kids, after they jump like crazy on a trampoline for a bit, are all revved up, but, like many SPD kids, not Frank. He'll jump for a bit, and then flop down on the couch and zone out. (The zoning out may have more to do with his cold he currently has, though. We'll see as time goes on!)<br />
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In other news, he is taking vitamins now. He swallows these gummy vitamins whole, instead of chewing them, but they get in his body, so I really don't care. :)Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-16860157485701687492011-09-08T19:52:00.000-04:002011-09-08T19:52:45.608-04:00KindergartenYesterday was the first day of kindergarten. Frank is going to the same place he's gone to daycare since he was five months old. It's a full day, as opposed to our home district, which is only a half day. Also, this class has only 13 kids, and a teacher and an aide, whereas he could have 25 kids in his class at our local elementary school, and one teacher. We figured that, with the SPD and the fact that he won't be five for another two weeks, lots of attention would be good. Also, with the SPD and difficulty with transitions, this gives him another year to mature before we throw him in with a whole bunch of new kids.<br />
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He got a bit teary-eyed yesterday when I brought him to school. He told me on the way in that, "I hate new school years. I hate going to a new class. It's so stupid. I did fine in my old class." Well, you can't really fault his logic, I guess.<br />
<br />
Much to my pleasure, the aide from his class last year is in his class this year. He saw her and yelled out her name and gave her a huge bear hug. That alone helped a bit, I think. I wonder if it was just a natural switching thigns around, so things don't get stale, or if the director switched her for Frank's sake. They've been awesome all along with all of his quirks, so I wouldn't put it past them. <br />
<br />
Frank was and probably always will be the first to arrive in the morning, which can be difficult, because there was nothign to distract from the fact that OH MY GOD THIS IS A WHOLE NEW CLASSROOM AND NEW TEACHER. When this sawned on him, less than a minute after he'd hugged the aide, he began to weep and threw his arms around me. I picked him up and began to wander around the room, pointing things out to him. He eventually calmed down, and perked up when the teacher said casually, "Hey, Frank, let's turn on the computer." Frank loves to play games on the computer. He immediately slid down from me and ran and sat at the computer, where he and the teacher discussed games at his favorite websites.<br />
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I left after about a half hour there. I have first period off this year, which is nice, because I'm not as rushed in the mornings, so I could take the time to help him settle in. I called in mid-morning, and the teacher reassured me he was fine. <br />
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When I went to pick him up, he was exhausted. He was ornery adn cranky all evening, and went right down at bedtime. He woke around 6:30am this morning, which is late for him. Right now, it's ten minutes to eight at night, and I put him to bed around 7:15pm. He didn't complain. This new kindergarten routine must be exhausting!<br />
<br />
So, all in all, the transitionhas gone well. I can now start to worry about first grade, next year, in a whole new school. That, my friends, is going to be the real culture shock.<br />
<br />
So...how was your first day of school?Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-69561067669998170882011-09-05T20:27:00.000-04:002011-09-05T20:27:11.602-04:00New School YearFrank and I did some back-to-school shopping today, specifically, for clothing. (Note to self: Never ever do this on Labor Day again. Ever. It's like shopping for presents on December 23rd.) He's got plenty of t-shirts, but I was looking for long sleeved shirts. Target didn't seem to have much out yet, which is fine. But it occured to me while we were shopping that things I do as part of routine might seem odd to others.<br />
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For example, I picked up one long-sleeved shirt. I felt it, and then said to Frank, "Hey, how does this feel to you?" Most mothers would ask their child how the shirt looks. Frank truly does not care how a shirt looks. You could put anything on him, and so long as it covers his body, and doesn't itch, he's good. It doesn't have to match his pants, either. (He's started picking out his own clothing in the morning. The results have been interesting at times.)<br />
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He was very matter-of-fact about my question, too. He ran his fingers over the inside seam in the neck, and said, "Feels good to me." I bought the shirt in every color they had for this style, because, as the SPD parents all know, when you find something the kid approves, this is what you do.<br />
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Some brands of shirts, I can buy without him accompanying me, because I know from past sizes that they feel good to him. But new ones, I always have him approve for me, because the last thing I need is to be faced with, "I don't like that shirt- it itches!" on a school morning. <br />
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We had to skip OT last week, and will have to skip this week as well. I don't like doing that, but that's how it goes, I guess.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-82870172567534339692011-09-03T14:37:00.000-04:002011-09-03T14:37:10.694-04:00Disney World!We are back from Disney. Overall, it was a good trip. We did, however, hit some snafus along the way:<br />
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1. Sleeping arrangements. My mother in law (MIL) came with us. The way the suite was set up at Animal Kingdom Lodge- Kidani Village, we decided that Frank and MIL would sleep in the same room. MIL would have the queen-sized bed, and Frank would have the pull-out couch, which was far closer to the ground.<br />
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"Can't you take the mattress and put it on the floor?" the boy asked me. Um, no. There was not enough floor space to take the double-sized mattress and put it on the floor. The first night, he had a bit of a hard time sleeping, but by the second night, he was fine.<br />
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"I can't sleep without someone in here with me!" Yes, it was a different sleeping enviornment, with no night light, and different noises, and different shadows on the walls. Fortunately, I guess, we pretty well wore out Grandma each day, so she was perfectly happy to go to bed when Frank did. And we left the bathroom light on all night, which sufficed as a night light.<br />
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2. Meals: We booked a Character Breakfast the first morning we were there, and a Character Dinner close to the end of our trip. The dinner went over far better than the breakfast. The Character part, you see, was great both times, but Frank has only recently started eating many typical breakfast foods, so when I got him some Mickey-shaped waffles and a couple of pancakes, he took one look at them, and...<br />
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"I don't like these. They're different from mine."<br />
<br />
Now, our plan that day was to eat, take the obligatory pictures, and then go right to a park for the morning. We were not going back to our room, and in any case, we did not have any food in our room. We got him to eat a bite or two of the waffle, even threatening him with, "If you do not eat that waffle, you are getting nothing until lunch, and it is a LONG time until then!" Yes, SPD parents, I know: very counterproductive. <br />
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I resorted to desperate measures: "Try a hash brown. They're like French fries and you can drown them in ketchup!" There was some hesitation, but he eventually tried one- SCORE! He liked it, and ate two. Okay, whatever, the kid ate something, let's go play.<br />
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Later that day, Darrel went food shopping and bought the neccessary supplies for the week: chicken nuggets, fish sticks, and frozen waffles. Oh, and tea bags for Mommy.<br />
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3. The Heat and Humidity: Frank takes after myself and my father's family in this regard. Father's Family does not handle heat well. At all. This, I assume, is why we always headed north to the Adirondacks during summers when I was a child. The first day at Disney, after walking from the parking lot, Frank began to whine about how<em> hot</em> it was, and he was <em>sooo tired</em>, and could we <em>pleeeeease</em> carry him? My husband and I are quick learners- we rented a stroller for him after that session. Best. Thing. Ever. <br />
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The kid still whined about how<em> hoooot</em> it was, mind you. But we didn't have to carry him while he did so.<br />
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I also ended up buying him an $18 fan/water squirty thing combo. He whined for four days how much he <em>wanted</em> it before I gave in, though. (That counts for something, right?)<br />
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All in all, he had a great time. Frank LOVES crazy roller coaster rides. This suits me just fine, because Darrel loves them, too, and now he has someone to go on these rides with. I do not do well on anything faster or more spinning than a Ferris Wheel. (Or Star Tours. I loved Star Tours. I suspect the Star Wars geekdom is strong enough to overcome the vertigo.) I get really bad vertigo. (Hmm...vestibular issues?) I am the one who's perfectly content much to the surprise of others, to hold everyone's stuff while the rest of my party goes on a ride. Big Thunder Mountain Railroad? The boys went on it six times altogether. Star Tours- I think Frank went on it ten times altogether. The only big rides he did not go on at Disney were Space Mountain and Tower of Terror. <br />
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He also loved the characters. For those who have never been, most of the characters you meet are in costumes that make them between six and seven feet tall, which can be intimidating to some kids. Not to Mr Personality, though- he ran right up and hugged Mickey, Minnie, Goofy, et al. The characters in costumes do not talk, either, but they communicate very eloquently with gestures. (Well, at least to me- maybe it was easy for me to understand because of all the signing I do?) Frank would start up a "conversation" with the characters...continuing even after we'd taken his picture and the character was trying to inch away gracefully and go on to the next kid:<br />
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"Goofy, I really like the pizza here! I eat pizza now, do you know that? My favorite pizza is Hometown Pizza, but I like yours a lot! I ate three pieces of this pizza! Did you eat some, or do you just cook it? How many kids do you talk to every day? I saw Mickey, Minnie, Pluto, and Doald before! Do you remember me from breakfast?"<br />
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Darrel turned to me and said, "Only our kid could have a complete conversation with a character that does not talk back."<br />
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The trip home left a bit to be desired. Thanks to Hurricane Irene, we ended up driving home instead of flying. 20 hours in a car is more fun than any human should be allowed, trust me. We drove as far as Charlotte, NC, Sunday night, and crashed with my cousin and her family. this is the same cousin whose son and Frank were thick as thieves in Delaware, so they were delighted to have an impromptu sleepover. Then, we got up Monday morning and drove the rest of the way home, arriving at about 7pm that night.<br />
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I'm still exhausted. Darrel wants to go back in three years. I wonder if seven year olds can fit in those strollers.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-5695513033749583842011-08-16T20:23:00.000-04:002011-08-16T20:23:34.689-04:00Two steps forward, one step backI brought a bunch of fruits and vegetables today to OT. We had discussed this last week, and Frank went food shopping with me yesterday to get them, so he actually picked out a few things himself. He seemed pretty enthusiastic, and he's made a lot of progress recently, so I was cautiously optimistic.<br />
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We got him to try some baked potato. Through a lot of tears, whining, and throwing himself into my lap and hiding his face. "I...can't...I...don't...want...to! It scares me!"<br />
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I freely admit I was not in the best frame of mind today, anyway. I had a medical thing this morning (for details on that, you can check out my other blog, <a href="http://silverandgoldhealth.blogspot.com/">http://silverandgoldhealth.blogspot.com/</a>). My brain is usually a little fuzzy after that, and I sometimes am cranky, too. These are normal reactions to IVIG infusions, so I'm not real worried about it, especially because they pretty well always disappear by the following morning. But, mental note: OT feeding sessions are generally not good to have right after IVIG. <br />
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So. D, the OT, did not seem at all surprised or concerned at today's lack of results. I, however, felt like my head was going to explode. I tried to be calm and encouraging, but after a while I just shut up and let D do all the talking. Really, what I wanted to do at that point was just get up and leave the two of them alone in the room- maybe that would have helped? I don't know, but I do know that Frank totally feeds off my moods quite often. <br />
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I've been kind of on a high recently with this. He's using the potty for everything, all day long! He's eating new foods! He's very articulate about thigns when they bother him, instead of melting down! He handles routine changes beautifully! We're gettin' it done! He's not going to be that weird kid in his class after all!<br />
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This evening, I am depressed about his future social prospects again.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-44761384317410595612011-08-14T21:49:00.000-04:002011-08-14T21:49:23.655-04:00Life and stuffI didn't post about OT this week because life got in the way. My mother is in the hospital with pneumonia. She'll be discharged tomorrow, so she's doing much better. But for the first time in a while, I found myself focusing much more on another human than my child. <br />
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The child in question handles mild changes in routine pretty well. I have purposely established things regarding him to run in a similar manner but not the exact same routine every day. Like most kids with SPD, Frank thrives on routine. As D explained to me, when you have a routine, you know what sensory "assaults" are coming your way each day. You know when and how to "gird your loins", so to speak. When that routine changes, and especially without advance notice, it's disturbing, because you don't know what's coming your way.<br />
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Frank used to be much worse. During his evening routine, for example, first he had to have a bath, then get dressed, then get a story or two (from Daddy, not me), then brush teeth, then bed, and we had to always say the exact same things as we said good night to him. If you varied this routine even slightly, he freaked out. As D explained it, back in the day when I feared a diagnosis of SPD meant he had autism, "Generally speaking, autistic kids don't freak out at changes in routine bcause of their autism. They freak out because they have SPD, too."<br />
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The Vacation We Do Not Speak Of, from two years ago? He was miserable because he wasn't in his bed at night and naptime, and wasn't at his chair in his kitchen for meals, and these chicken nuggets didn't look like his at home, and when were we going home?<br />
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After discussing that in detail with D, and with my husband, we started changing things up. I started doing different routines at bedtime every night. I started having him sit in different chairs at the kitchen table to eat, and, once he outgrew his milk allergy, We started bringing him to McDonalds and Wendys, and stopped bringing a baggie of chicken nuggets from home everywhere we went- if it was a place like a diner, where I knew they'd serve chicken nuggets or chicken fingers, we started ordering those for him. <br />
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This went over with the boy, as my mother would say, like a fart in church. The first dozen or so times we tried to get him to eat Other Chicken, he had a hissy fit and refused to eat it. Frustrating, to be sure, but, really, I had expected no less from him. <br />
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He also disliked changes in bedtime routine. "NO! Brush teeth comes after story, not before!!" Such small things, but oh so important to him. <br />
<br />
Anyway, in such small steps are changes made. Frank is pretty flexible about most changes in routine now. He knows by now that I and my husband have got his back, no matter what. We've even left him with a few babysitters a few times, babysitters who were Not Grandma, and he had a splendid time with someone new to play with. <br />
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Anyway, back to my original topic, when Mom called to say she was going to the hospital Tuesday night, while I waited for my husband to get home from work, I got Frank his dinner and got things organzied for the evening. I told him Mimi was sick and I was going to see her in the hospital as soon as Daddy got home. Even though I'm the one who handles most of his evening routine usually, because my husband works until after 7pm, this didn't seem to faze him at all. And the times I've left for a few hours, or taken him, to visit my mother didn't seem to faze him, either. <br />
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He's much calmer about changes now than he was two years ago, or even one year ago. I am hoping this continues when we go to Disney!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-37643718251901590592011-08-05T22:08:00.000-04:002011-08-05T22:08:42.015-04:00Two weeksThat's how long it's been since he's had an accident.<br />
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He still hasn't pooped in the toilet at school, though, so I fear it's only a matter of time.<br />
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He's ceased complaining about pain when he uses the toilet, and I have not put any Miralax in his food in...hm, six weeks, maybe? I really think my intial theory was correct- he was complaining that it hurt to poop in the toilet, but didn't hurt to poop in his diaper, because the different angle felt strange to him, and he misinterpreted that strangeness as pain. <br />
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He tried a sugar cookie today. He was kind of excited about it, too. The sugar cookies I bought are plain, beige cookies. Beige to him has come to equal tolerable food in some ways. Beige does not have little surprise bits in it, like chocolate chips. He bit into the cookie, and burst into tears. <br />
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"I don't like it!"<br />
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I tried to get him to finish that cookie, but he was a mess. When I got him calmed down, he was able to tell me, "It's too sugary!" <br />
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My son is a salt fiend. The only thing with sugar that goes into his body on a regular basis is apple juice. So, while I was a bit disappointed, I wasn't all that shocked. <br />
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D, his OT, says she wants to get him to eat a cupcake- not the icing, but the cake part. Cupcakes are a huge part of social things for kids his age, and kids will start to notice soon that he eats differently, and, as we know, kids can be so cruel. I still want him to eat fruits and veggies, but, honestly, as someone who was picked on for virtually her entire schooling years, I agree with D; anything that will lessen the chances of him being an easy target for bullying is really a splendid idea in my book.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-85581803642210636992011-08-04T21:09:00.000-04:002011-08-04T21:09:23.193-04:00Big Boy BedWhen Frank was about two and a half, we took him out of the crib. He was getting entirely too big for it, and I feared, the way he jumped around in it, that he would break it. We had set up the Big Boy Bed (BBB) in his room, but he flat out refused to use it. "I'm not big enough for it yet," he said. I set the crib mattress on the floor in his room...and he's slept there ever since, on the floor, next to his bed. When we go away, we have to pull the mattress off one of the beds and put it on the floor. We've never flown anywhere with him before, so we've had the luxury of being able to bring all his "buddies" (stuffed animals) that he sleeps with along on any trips we've gone on. And there are a lot of buddies...I think right now there's about 15 of them. <br />
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Anyway, the crib mattress is starting to show some wear and tear. And Frank's legs are starting to hang off the end. He'll willingly lie down on the BBB for story time, or to pretend to sleep, but lights out at night, and the door closes, he has to be on the crib mattress on the floor. I've explained to him how he's growing, and soon he won't be able to fit on the mattress any more, and he keeps saying that "someday" he'll use the BBB. <br />
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Tonight I spent some time talking about it. He kept trying to change the subject, but I kept pressing him. We went in his room, turned the light out, and laid down, and I asked him how does the BBB feel? How does it smell? How do things look from up there? How does your body feel up there? Each thing he told me, I explained why that was different from the mattress: The sheets on the bed are new, and haven't been washed much yet, so they feel a bit rough. The BBB makes different noises than the mattress does when you move around on it. It smells differently up there because his head hasn't laid on that pillow that often- let's put the buddies up there and see if that helps. (It did.) <br />
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He didn't like talking about all this, and told me he doesn't like it when we "force [him] to do something different." I explained to him that sometimes we have to do things that are different, and they just take some getting used to. I told him we know and understand that he has a hard time with doing some things that are different, that his brain works a little differently than others, and that it's mine and Darrel's jobs to teach him how to deal with that. He didn't say much.<br />
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I think sometimes I maybe talk too much, that because he has a really sophisitcated vocabulary for his age, and catches onto things really quickly, that I can talk as if he's much older than he is. I'm not sure how much he understands when I babble on at him like that. I guess at some point he'll start to understand and process fully when I explain stuff like this to him.<br />
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In the meantime, i really hope he starts using the BBB soon, before I have to force the issue and take the mattress away from him!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-9668996342560179322011-07-30T22:54:00.000-04:002011-07-30T22:54:14.285-04:00Is this really my kid??So, this morning was a lazy morning; we all basically hung out in our PJs until nearly noon. Darrel made pancakes and bacon. (For those who don't know, generally, I cook dinners, except for red meat. Red meat is a man's job, in my opinion. And breakfast? My husband excels at cooking breakfast, so, when we occasionally do something more elaborate than cereal, he cooks.) We talked with Frank while we ate. I mentioned again to Frank about how I was planning on bringing a waffle and a pancake to OT this coming Tuesday because I really think he'll like them. "Also, when we go to Disney," Darrel added, "You can have pancakes shaped like Mickey's head!" Frank was intrigued by this, so Darrel explained how they make the pancakes with the head and two ears to look like Mickey's sillouette. I asked Frank to touch a pancake, he willingly did so, and I thought that was the end of it.<br />
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An hour later, I was outside doing some gardening, and Darrel came out to find me. "Guess what he's doing right now," he said.<br />
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"Um...watching TV?"<br />
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"Besides that."<br />
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"Um...eating lunch?"<br />
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"Sort of."<br />
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"Eating a pancake?" I really didn't believe this one, but tossed it out there just as a guess. Imagine how shocked I was when Darrel nodded. Apparently, Frank had wandered into the kitchen while Darrel was cleaning up some stuff, and started poking at the pile of leftover pancakes. Darrel casually offered him one, and Frank hesitated, and then said, "I'll just take a small piece." He tore off a small piece, ate it, and decided he liked it, so he grabed the remainder of that pancake and shoved it in his mouth!<br />
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Wow. My kid ate a pancake!<br />
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We thought that was the end of the pleasant surprises for the day. Nope, the kid had other plans. About an hour after he ate the pancake, he calmly got up, went in the bathroom, got his potty seat set up...and pooped in the potty, only calling out for help when it was time to wipe him off! He's used the toilet for number two off and on for a few weeks now, but this was the first time he's done it all totally on his own, and not asked for someone to keep him company. (Yeah, sitting with my son in the bathroom while he defacates...not one of those Hallmark parenting moments anyone ever tells you about.)<br />
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THEN, later in the evening, we got back from food shopping and were putting the food away. I had gotten chocolate chip cookies, with the idea of bringing them to OT Tuesday. I showed them to Frank, and he was intrigued again. He came over to check the package out. Darrel asked him if he wanted to try one: "I'll eat half of a cookie, and you eat the other half." Much to both of our surprise, Frank agreed! He took a decent sized bite, chewed, and swallowed...and then ran for his milk to get rid of the taste. The cookie itself, he said, was fine, but, ..."I didn't like the chips, Mommy. They were too much, too chocolatey."<br />
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"That's fine, honey," I told him. "You tried it, and the trying to me is the most important part. You are not going to like every single thing you eat, but I want you to be able to try anythign we ask you to."<br />
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As a reward for all his good work today, we got McDonald's for dinner. (My child is an American. If he could eat McDonald's for dinner every night of the week, he would.) He also got to play extended Wii time with Daddy this evening, finally getting to bed about 8:30pm.<br />
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He's been so open and into trying new things recently, it's nuts! I keep worrying that it's going to end, and he'll go back to his previously-limited diet again soon. But we both think he's getting bored eating the same things the same times every single day, and maybe that's playing into his interest. Whether it's that or he wants to please D, his OT, I don't really care- I just hope it continues!Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-46113516512754318212011-07-28T23:00:00.000-04:002011-07-28T23:00:33.239-04:00OT TuesdayThis week, we returned from our whirlwind road trip, unpacked, got food, hopped in the car, and flew to OT. I brought Grover Juice and Big Bird Juice in the jugs. ("I can't drink that, Mommy! It doesn't taste the same if it's not in the juice box!") I also brought Cherrios, which he used to eat, kind of, and Nilla Wafers. I loved Nilla Wafers as a kid. They're the kind of cookie that just one bite can bring back childhood memories. Also, they're prety basic and plain, so I thought maybe we had a good shot at getting those going.<br />
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This week, we went four for four! He drank the juice immediately, willingly ate the handful of Cheerios I'd brought in a baggie, and, after some convincing and discussion with D, he actually ate one entire Nilla Wafer! So, he had more homework added on- not only is he to continue drinking milk with dinner, and a juice box of regular apple juice every day, but he is to drink so Grover Juice and Big Bird Juice out of a jug every day as well. He also has to eat one Nilla Wafer each day.<br />
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He's been grudgeingly and slowly nibbling his way through each cookie, but actually asked for Cheerios for breakfast yesterday and today. We (Darrel, D the OT, and I) all think he's grown bored with eating the same foods for the same meals every day, and is therefore a bit more open to trying new stuff. In this spirit of open mindedness, I am going to be a bit more daring next week- I am bringing a frozen waffle and a frozen pancake to OT. (They have a toaster oven there we can use to heat them up.) I am also going to bring a small bowl of pasta with butter.<br />
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D told me she would like to get him to eat a cupcake. Not the icing part, but the cake part. Food in our society is a very social thing, and Frank is rapidly approaching the age where other kids are going to actually start noticing what he's eating. Plenty of little kids don't eat icing, so if we can get him to eat the cake part, he'll blend a lot more, socially. <br />
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It's going to be a bit of a challenge- aside from juice, Nilla Wafers are the first things he's eaten that are at all sugary. Cake is also a vastly different texture from anything he eats right now. It'll have to be a vanilla cupcake, too, because there's no way either of us could ever convince him to eat a chocolate one, with how dark in color it is. <br />
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I had lunch yesterday with two of my oldest friends. One of them has a young son, younger than Frank. The son has food issues, too, although not from SPD. A and I spent probably half of lunch discussing our son's food issues, and therapies, and things people say when they're trying to be helpful. It was extremely cathartic, and made me wish I could set up a support group for parents of kids with SPD around here. Discussing with online friends is wonderful, but in person would be so much better!<br />
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I forgot to mention, in the Road Trip entry, details about the rides on the boardwalk. I get vertigo very easily. I, generally speaking, do not enjoy rides at all. I like the Ferris Wheel, and a merry-go-round, but that's pretty much it. Frank went on a ton of rides Sunday (some by himself, others with my cousins), and he had a BLAST! As I said to my husband (who loves roller coasters), when I told him the story, "I think you have your roller coaster partner." I suppose I shouldn't have been so surprised at how into them Frank got- the kid does love it when I spin him around, and keeps begging for more. The only ride he refused was one he deemed too loud, and he calmly informed me of that before we even got on line for it, for which I complimented him. <br />
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Maybe my constant talking about how things feel, or sound, or taste, is finally starting to reap some benefits?Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-103624828534470539.post-35880950097432738982011-07-28T21:28:00.000-04:002011-07-28T21:28:16.953-04:00Road trip!Last week, I got a text message from my cousin, L: "We're heading to my mom's house in Rehoboth Beach. Do you want to come meet us there?"<br />
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I have six first cousins, on my father's side. I used to have seven, but one died six weeks before my wedding. Our parents are all very close, and as such,w e grew up very close as well. We saw each other frequently, and our families all vacationed together. Now, we are spread all over the country, and I miss my cousins in ways I can't even describe. Usually, I only see them at weddings (the older generation of my family has not yet started to die off, fortunately, so there have been no funerals in the mix, aside from the aforementioned cousin). The last time I saw them was over a year ago, at the wedding of the youngest cousin. <br />
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So, my response, after squeeing a bit, was HELL, YEAH! Darrel couldn't get off work at such short notice, so, on Sunday morning, I packed up, threw Frank in the car with a bunch of toys, books, and snacks, and set off for Rehoboth Beach.<br />
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Frank had never met my cousins. Frank had never slept in the same room as, well, anyone. The last time Frank was on a beach (Rehoboth, actually), it was for the Vacation We Pretend Never Happened. Frank was miserable all week that time- he was too hot, the sand was too hot, the ocean was too loud and too scary, the sand itched everywhere it touched him...you name it, he complained about it. Darrel was unhappy, because he loves the beach, and wa sincredibly disappointed Frank seemed to hate it. I was unhappy because I like being on the go and seeing new things on a vacation, not sitting on a beach for a week doing nothing.<br />
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So, while I drove, and Frank occupied himself by singing and playing with his toys, I worried. We were only going for less than 48 hours. How bad could it all be? <br />
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Okay, now that the SPD mommies have all stopped laughing at that one. ;)<br />
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Actually...it turned out great!! Cousin J has two children: G, a son, is just over a year older than Frank. E, a daughter, is two. L, her older sister, was also there, and my aunt and my aunt's second husband, the owners of the house, were there as well. <br />
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Frank and G hit it off immediately. An hour after meeting, they were sitting curled up in a chair together, watching TV. They ran around doing all kinds of things together. When we went to the boardwalk that evening, they rode all kinds of rides together. They even slept in the same room together! (I had brought the crib mattress Frank sleeps on, as well as all his "buddies"- stuffed animals- and set everything up exactly as it was at home. We set the crib mattress up on the floor in G's room.) The boys didn't get to sleep until around 10:30pm Sunday night. Their room was right across from mine, so I was able to hear them whispering to each other. It was very cute, and made me smile a lot. (J and I are only months apart, and we slept over each others' house frequently when we were growing up.)<br />
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Monday, we went to the beach. Frank willingly let me lube him up with sunscreen, which alone is an improvement over the beginning of summer- he complained about how cold it was, and it smelled, and it felt funny on his skin. Monday, though, he simply stood there, chatting with G, while I did so. <br />
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To sum up, this time, Frank loved the beach! he played in the sand with G, and went in the water with the grownups. He had a bit of a scare early on, when he went charging into the water to get some in a bucket for the sand castle he and G were building, and actually went under. But L was right there and grabbed him immediately, and, after I got his face dried off and calmed him down, he went right back to the water's edge! I almost cried, I was so happy that day. When we went back to the car, he had sand everywhere, and never mentioned it at all. He bathed with G, and we ate dinner and put the kids to bed early.<br />
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Tuesday morning, Frank and I had to leave- he had a 3pm appointment for OT, and I of course did not want to miss it. We hugged everyone, said good bye, and hit the road.<br />
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Not only was it great to see my cousins unexpectedly, but it was also nice from a different perspective: once I had explained the exact nature of Frank's SPD, and the types of problems he tended to have, and everyone asked the questions they had, that was it. It was all No Big Deal. When we ate, they'd ask what Frank wanted to eat, but it was very much in the same way they'd ask anyone, not in that "what does your strange child with his strange eating ways want to eat" tone I often hear. I had forgotten how relaxing it could be, just hanging with family, listening to kids running around playing, and not having a care in the world.Karinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02709304943054103397noreply@blogger.com0